my heart has been written in words

cause we speak in silence every time our eyes meet

2011-03-06T21:24:00.000+07:00

you!

pause. I think I lost in words

you! again.

one annoyingly happy creature

smile through analyzing eyes

you!

rewind. I remember you,yes I do

a man with bright sky written on his face

you! again.

who always talk in silence language

every time our eyes meet

you!

play. We were vomiting words,finally

a broken silence, a five seconds of sunny smile

in cloudy November

you! again.

captured few of my heart euphoria

which,I denied

I!

pause. a 20% normal,a 80% prestige

a bitter heart, abandoned affection

captured you in her bitter smile

which,her denied

I!

rewind. broken in uncountable times

a fearless dreamer who fear her own heart

not the failure,she fears

tiresome, of looping heart affection

I!

play. remember you in her everyday prayers

she talks in silence language

her prestige thinks faster than sound

her hope is not to hope

she sits,waiting. you

she's in denial but in hope

she's apologizing

in pink February

she's watching. you,in colorful forms

she's patiently waiting your smile

you and sunny smile,her ultimate favorite

she,looking at past times and misses

every single thing you ever did that bothered her

the annoyingly happy of silence spoken words

every time their eyes meet

yet,she wears her hidden sweetest smile

and humming

"Kamu. Aku tak akan mengejarmu. Setiap sudut semesta memantulkanmu. Kembali." :)

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia 13.02.11 20:16, tunes: Nothing Like You and I by The Perishers

2011-03-06T21:17:00.000+07:00

2011-03-06T21:15:00.000+07:00

You can fall for everyone who treats you special. Just make sure at the end, you know your way home to the one who treats you as their life..

Sharp!

2011-03-06T21:11:00.000+07:00

I stand there,did not talk

They stared and wondered

They whispered

With sharp silence words

I smiled,and talked

They smiled

Wearing suspicious eyes

With indescribable fake plastic smile

I go right

They go left

Still whispering motives

With sharp silence words

I'm here

Still smiling with patience in my hands

I recall,"that's okay"

Over and over

More they talked

More I gained strength

I believe life is fair

And I believe in kindness

They talked

With sharp silence words

I smiled

With the most sweetest smile

And recall,"that's okay. I'll get cut but I'll be perfectly fine."

:)

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia 30.01.11 08:56

2011-03-06T21:07:00.000+07:00

2011-03-06T21:05:00.000+07:00

What's the sweetest time of the day? It's when you pray. Because, you're talking to the One who love you most..

a blooming self

2011-03-06T21:02:00.000+07:00

Earthquakes can’t shake me.

Hurricanes can’t take away my dreams.

I will  face this journey as strong as I could.

I will not let anyone hinder me  from success.

I will do what I can to achieve my goals and to fulfill  my dreams.

I will be my very best.

I will be what I want to be.

I will  be everything that I could ever be.

Be it an architect or a doctor, a  lawyer or psychologist, a chemist or an astronaut.

Everything that I  could possibly be.

I am a strong girl and I will let my star shine out  bright.

I will let my star shine brighter than my critic’s.

I will never  let bad vibes bring me down.

I am a beautiful girl inside.

My face  isn’t as perfect as those of the models’ but I have a heart as beautiful  as their face.

Looks is not what it takes to be successful.

It takes  guts, courage, and will.

The guts to take a risk, the courage to achieve  your goals,

and the will to make everything happen.

I can do this with  or without help.

I believe in myself.

I know I can do it.

I know I can  take whatever journey life will bring me.

I can take whatever road comes  in front of me.

I can pass whatever challenge God will give.

I have  faith, I still hope, and I will always believe in myself.

Self-assurance  and confidence is all it takes for me to succeed.

Because I am, and  these dreams I have are part of my life.﻿.

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia 11.12.10 10:44

2011-01-27T05:40:00.000+07:00

She's strong,because she knows what it's like to be weak. She keeps a guard,because she knows what it's like to cry herself to sleep..

Catch me!

2011-01-22T08:57:00.001+07:00

2011-01-22T08:55:00.000+07:00

2011-01-22T08:44:00.000+07:00

I want to find a boy I can travel the world with and loving my super annoying eat habit..

2011-01-22T08:41:00.000+07:00

When you're down to nothing, GOD is up to something. The faithful see the invisible, believe the incredible, and receive the impossible..

a glint of heart euphoria

2011-01-22T08:35:00.000+07:00

everyone wrote it

the sacred four letters

often humming in our ears

whispering a pink voices

forming an euphoria

the sacred euphoria

a faster heartbeat

longing for a congratulation

a homecoming

for the long lost four letters

her lips are blooming

her reddish cheek can't hide

her pounding heart

her glowing eyes

her heart euphoria

her sacred four letters

she's happy

tears are dropping

a happy one..

she's welcoming a feeling

she thought she'd forgotten :)

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia 10.12.10 14:39 

different colors of tears

2011-01-22T08:31:00.000+07:00

those were only my imaginations

hopes and expectations

they weren't exist

you aren't exist

your existence in my thousand dreams

those were imaginations

i played pretend

i played waiting

but i'm still awake with different colors of tears

i've got my lesson learned

got a heart full of patience

but still HAVE these different colors of tears

my Only One Creator..

I am tired, I am weary, I could sleep for a thousand years

just for once

please wake me up with rainbows

don't give me expectations

complexions

i had enough

swimming inside different colors of tears

but now,here i am again..

and Your answer is still the same,"Not yet,my dear..."

I know :)

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia 2.10.10 00:36 

2010-07-22T00:22:00.001+07:00

2010-06-27T06:53:00.002+07:00

"If I'm no one for you, If I'm nobody to you, If I'm nothing to you...please tell me, WHY DID YOU LIE TO ME??"

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

DAMN RIGHT !!

2010-06-26T15:39:00.002+07:00

So I hope you see me walking down the street, looking   gorgeous. 

I’ll dress up, I’ll put on my hottest jeans, my best shirt, 

and I’ll do my hair and makeup just right. 

I hope you see me walking   down the street holding onto his hand. 

I’ll even walk right by your   house and smile right before he kisses me. 

Why you ask? 

Because once,   just once...

I want you to see what you’re missing :)

Let me Let YOU go

2010-06-26T07:13:00.005+07:00

Here’s what I’m going to do: 

I’m going to stop dwelling. 

I’m going to  stop watching the phone. 

I’m going to stop looking for you. 

I’m going to  move on. 

I’m going to meet people. 

I’m going to live. 

I’m going to  forget all the nights I spent wishing you were here. 

I’m going to forget  the times that it was just us. 

I’m going to forget the things that  shouldn’t have happened. 

I’m going to forget all the times I opened  myself up to let you in, to only get hurt in return.
I’m going to forget  how I felt about you. 

Instead, I’m going to subconsciously wait. 

If you  really want me, if you miss me, if you can’t breathe without me, you’ll  know. 

You’ll ring. You’ll text. You’ll visit. 

And if you drift, if you  don’t call, if there’s no texts, if there’s no visits, I’ll know. 

I’ll  know it was never meant to be. 
And I will continue moving on. And I’m  going to walk tall.

 But in between everything I will forget, 
I won’t  forget the lesson I’ve learned. 

I won’t forget the feeling of loving  someone. 

I won’t forget the feeling of thinking I’m loved. 

And I will  certainly not forget 
the hell I was put through to learn all this, 

to  become a better person..

idareyoutoclickthis

#iramahari

2010-06-20T23:20:00.006+07:00

These are collections of my favorites #iramahari that I got from twitter, some of those from my friend Raditya Dika, Salman Aristo and some of those are actually mine. Unfortunately, they're in Bahasa not in English.. Check this out:

Dari damai yang diberikan ketika kepala bertemu sajadah

Dari detakan jam di kamar seseorang yang sudah terlalu lama menunggu kepastian

Dari bunyi dua bibir bertemu dibalik sebuah pengkhianatan

Dari hisapan rokok yang menghitamkan sisa umur

Dari hembusan nafas kesabaran yang beranakkan keikhlasan diri

Dari sebuah simpul nasib yang menanti ujung takdir

Dari kecupan hangat disambut pelukan erat tanpa batas

Dari tumpukan rasa sabar yang membangun ketegaran

Dari keceriaan seorang bocah kecil yang mengubah dunia kelabu menjadi merah jambu

Dari kecaman batin yang mengutuk rangkaian pengkhianatan

Dari umpatan hati seorang pemuda yang ingin dicintai dengan caranya hanya berbalas keresahan

Dari haru tangis bahagia sahabat meliputi janji sehidup semati

Dari ketikan rasa hati muncul pengharapan dan rasa sayang

Dari pelaminan megah tercium kesucian melati dan dentingan gamelan

Dari perbedaan kontradiktif mencetuskan kebersamaan tak habis waktu

2010-06-06T02:38:00.002+07:00

"Laying head upon the grass,smelling clouds,counting stars,and breathing the blue sky...Life that I wish!"

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

2010-06-06T02:31:00.002+07:00

"If everything that I did was wrong,you taught me to be right. When I saw you doing wrong,I tried to remind you to be right and I'm still wrong."

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

2010-05-31T00:21:00.000+07:00

2010-05-30T23:12:00.002+07:00

"Jealousy consumes the heart of trust. Put on a standard mode, so you won't lose all the faith."

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

2010-05-30T23:09:00.002+07:00

"Karma is a roller coaster. You can be whether up or down in seconds."

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

2010-05-30T23:08:00.001+07:00

"People are selfish. Everybody is a killer. Victims are just a camouflage"

xx, Ayu   Putrinda Kurnia

2010-05-25T03:03:00.001+07:00

"Yes I was burned, but I call it a lesson learned
Mistake overturned, so I call it a lesson learned
My soul has returned, so I call it a lesson learned
Another lesson learned...

It's alright..."

*Alicia Keys 

2010-05-25T02:54:00.000+07:00

2010-05-25T02:21:00.001+07:00

"You change your mind
Like a girl changes clothes

And you over think
Always speak cryptically 

Cause you're hot then you're cold
You're yes then you're no
You're in then you're out
You're up then you're down
You're wrong when it's right
It's black and it's white

You don't really want to stay, no

But you don't really want to go..."

*Katy Perry

2010-05-25T02:11:00.001+07:00

"Wake up in the morning, stumble on my life...

Can't get no love without sacrifice...

If anything should happen, I guess I wish you well... 

A little bit of heaven, but a little bit of hell..."

*MIKA

2010-05-25T01:55:00.000+07:00

2010-05-25T01:44:00.001+07:00

"When you're dreaming with a broken heart 

Then waking up is the hardest part...

When you're dreaming with a broken heart 
The giving up is the hardest part..."

*John Mayer

2010-05-23T08:28:00.002+07:00

"Ya Allah sungguh kebahagiaan dan kesedihan itu tipis adanya. Bukakan mata dan hati, ikhlaskan kami atas segala."

*Fira Basuki

2010-05-23T08:25:00.001+07:00

"Tidak berujung pertanyaan mengapa, beratus ratus jam penantian, akankah terbang dan abu selamanya? sampai kapan harus buka tutup luka.."

xx, Ayu    Putrinda Kurnia 

2010-05-23T08:22:00.002+07:00

"Peluk aku sesaat, kecup hitungan detik..enggan tinggalkan hatimu disini, bawa pergi jika aku tidak berada disana... di hati"

xx, Ayu   Putrinda Kurnia 

2010-05-21T03:36:00.001+07:00

"You and your flirtatious have succeed broken my heart into pieces,over and over again..I don't have anything left, thanks to you"

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

2010-05-09T21:36:00.002+07:00

"I love you but it's not so easy to make you here with me
I wanna touch and hold you forever
But you’re still in my dream
And I can’t stand to wait ‘till night is coming to my life
But I still have a time to break a silence

When you love someone
Just be brave to say that you want him to be with you
When you hold your love
Don't ever let it go
Or you will loose your chance
To make your dreams come true…

I used to hide and watch you from a distance and I knew you realized
I was looking for a time to get closer at least to say… "hello"

 And I can't stand to wait your love is coming to my life

 

And I never thought that I'm so strong
I stuck on you and wait so long
But when love comes it can't be wrong
Don't ever give up just try and try to get what you want
Cause love will find the way…

When you love someone
Just be brave to say that you want him to be with you
When you hold your love
Don't ever let it go
Or you will loose your chance
To make your dreams come true…"

*Endah & Rhesa

When You Love Someone

2010-05-09T20:42:00.001+07:00

"Biarlah cinta yang bawa kita kesana..
dalam dunia ini hanya kita berdua..
untuk selamanya atau hanya sesaat..

tak perlu terucap kata.. biarkan mengalir apa adanya.."

*Maliq & d'Essential

2010-05-06T01:11:00.001+07:00

"Manusia selalu ingin dihargai dan dimengerti..jangan hanya meminta tetapi juga memberi, berlaku adil itu penting.."

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia 

2010-05-06T01:00:00.000+07:00

"When I had nothing to lose, I had everything...When I stopped being who I am, I found myself..."

2010-05-03T05:38:00.003+07:00

Quote-Book Tumblr

Nobody for Somebody

2010-05-03T05:29:00.005+07:00

I'm still here for I don't know how long

Standing still behind the shadow

I don't know how long can I survive

Survive from uncertainty

It's not you that I hate

It is the uncertainty

There's no YES

But there's no NO either

I'm learning

Learning to be more patience

Learning to smile with tears inside

Not because of you

Because of those unspoken words

I redeem my ego

Calming my thoughts

Wishing tomorrow will be better

Not waiting for nothing

I know I am nobody for you

Though I'm still here

Not because I'm stupid

It's simply because those 3 words

8 letters

Simply because of you..

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

2010-05-03T05:16:00.002+07:00

"I become a better person not for you, but for myself and that means I have to thank you.."

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

2010-05-03T05:13:00.002+07:00

"Where do you want me to stand: next to you,in the back following you,or maybe behind the shadow?"

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

2010-05-01T11:24:00.002+07:00

icanread Tumblr

2010-05-01T11:14:00.002+07:00

"Sometimes I need you to be here Your presence, so I can feel that you really are exist. But then, I changed my mind, I'm being selfish.."

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

2010-05-01T11:04:00.001+07:00

"I didn’t realize that he never tell lies
But hiding something, pain inside his heart
He stared at my eyes and he let me know everything
I was so surprised, the news wasn’t so nice

How do I know the truth if you didn’t say so
I would understand if you trust and believe in me
How do I know the truth if you didn’t say so
But you have to know that my love would last forever"

*Endah & Rhesa

2010-05-01T10:57:00.007+07:00

"When all the world is telling you NO, tell yourself YES ten times louder..."

*Keyshia Cole

another day with your words

2010-05-01T10:51:00.006+07:00

I pray and I pray

In whispers I tell a story about my mind

Hoping thee can grant all my wishes

I pray for my happiness

I pray for my sadness

I wait and I wait 

I wait for my happiness

I wait for my smile to come 

I wait till I can stand straight

Waiting for you, my endless happiness 

Sun is rising up rising down

Moon is smiling yet pouting

Day by day I went through

You in physical

I miss you

I changed the way I wait

I changed the way I pray

I turned to thee..to thee 

I understand you

You and your triplet souls

I smiled today

And I will be smiling tomorrow

With you..another day with your words

I miss you

You and dozens of happiness

I'm here :) 

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

2010-04-17T19:13:00.002+07:00

“I’m a picture without a frame.
A poem without a rhyme.
A car with three wheels.
A sun without fire.
I am a gun without bullets.
I am the truth without someone to hear it.
I am a feeling without someone to feel it.
This is who I am.
A mess without you.
Something beautiful with you.”

I Wrote This For You

2010-03-16T23:44:00.001+07:00

"I don't want to love you Forever..I want to love you until the end of our life..."

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

2010-03-16T23:22:00.002+07:00

terkadang rasa sayang itu tidak butuh jawaban, hanya butuh untuk diketahui saja. Jika saatnya tiba, jodoh atau perpisahan...

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

I believe

2010-03-16T23:14:00.003+07:00

I Believe… That just because two people argue, it doesn’t mean they don’t love each other. And just because they don’t argue, it doesn’t mean they do love each other.

I Believe… That you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

I Believe… That you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.

I Believe… That we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I Believe… That either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I Believe… That heroes are the people who do what has to be done, when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I Believe… That sometimes when I’m angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel.

I Believe… That it isn’t always enough, to be forgiven by others; sometimes, you have to learn to forgive yourself.

I Believe… That our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for whom we become.

I Believe… That you shouldn’t be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life Forever.

2010-03-14T02:12:00.003+07:00

Here comes the feeling you thought you'd forgotten.LOVE...

2010-03-14T01:07:00.000+07:00

I'm not a stop along the way...I am the Destination!

helpless heart

2010-03-13T23:04:00.003+07:00

I'm not that strong

I can assure you

I always love 

Love the way you notice

That I'm in my downfall

You were there

To pull me up

In your odd way

We're both aren't that strong

We know

We understand

We have that weak hearts

Sometimes can't stand straight

Always waiting for help

But we both denied it

Cos we think we are strong

Me with my helpless heart

My confused heart

So willing to know

Need some guidances

To reach its destination

To yours

Cos yet, my heart still got lost

It needs map

A certain map

No need for Google Map

Beyond the imagination

My heart loves conventional way

The helpless heart doesn't need help

It needs love to glow

It's still waiting

For another helpless heart

Somehow to complete each other

Both helpless hearts

Does it worth to wait?

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

2010-03-13T22:31:00.003+07:00

Buying me expensive good stuffs surely won't buy my heart because mine isn't for sale...

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

2010-03-11T03:50:00.002+07:00

I made mistakes. Instead of giving you reasons why, I promised myself that I'll be better tomorrow and starts to forgive myself for being careless..

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

Tears run dry

2010-03-11T03:39:00.004+07:00

It's a quite long journey that we have

Many riddles and much happiness

Yet we're still standing at uncertain edge

But I never get tired of you

I have never asked for more

I understand

I'm waiting

I smiled

I cried

I planned to stop

Stop waiting for us

But I can't help it

I care about you that much

Beyond my expectations

and Now we're here

Standing in silence

Because of my lack morality

Speechless

I know it was my fault

Shame

Just to put out my ego

and apologize

Tears running dry

I miss you that much

I care bout you that much

I love you like I should love

Instead of telling that to you

I let my tears running down

I'm sorry...

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

2010-03-11T03:22:00.003+07:00

Who are you to judge my life? I know that I'm not perfect and didn't live life to be. But before you start pointing fingers, make sure your hands are clean

*Bob Marley

2010-03-11T03:01:00.002+07:00

I pray for good health, safe travels and fun journeys. May I have the courage to follow my heart, Find adventure and embrace new people. I pray for my family and friends. May the wind always be at their backs..

I miss you

2010-03-11T02:44:00.004+07:00

I miss you when something really good happens, because you are the one I want to share it with..

I miss you when something is troubling me, because you are the one who understands me so well..

I miss you when I laugh and cry because I know that you are the one that makes my laughter grow and my tears disappear..

I miss you all the time, but I miss you most when I lay awake at night and think of all the wonderful times we spent with each other..

For those were some of the best times of my life..

daughter to father

2010-03-11T02:40:00.003+07:00

envious..
to see that another daughter could held her father's hand
envious..
to hear another daughter could yelled out her daddy
envious..
to see that another daughter could kiss and depend on her father

I am alone since i was 2
my mom is my best companion
i don't even remember his face
nothing...

curiousity..
tell me the truth,did you ever love me??
why'd u have to go?
did i ever hurt you?
do all men are irresponsible like you?
i don't know you and i never want to..

tell me the truth,did you ever love me??
cause these are..
confessions of a broken heart!!!!

but if you can see me here..
standing alone with courage
never drop any single tear for you
you should proud of me
because i'll be the best daughter that you'll never had..

tell me,did you ever love me??          

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

a complicated junk

2010-03-10T05:20:00.003+07:00

many times i saw your face
many times i've heard your voice
many times i've heard your complaints
many times i've heard your stories,whether it's bad or good

many times you fell down and i always there to catch you up
many times i saw your writings and never gets bored to read it
many times i trusted you
many times i depend myself on you

many times i fell down and you always there to catch me up
many times i complained bout my life and you were always listening
many times you make me smiled
many times i make you smiled

but what if,we are together get lost in the crowd?
i am not there and you're not here
what if,things getting difficult and we can't trust each other?
what if,i..starting to doubt you? can i trust?

what if,you start to see me as different vision
what if,i start to turn you into a big giant monster
what if,this transparent boundaries between us
slowly kill us,me and you

and you'll be questioning...      what is the opposite of two?
and my answer will be.... lonely me..lonely you...

should we give up?
should we stop?
should we forget?
   how about me?
 how about you?
and... how about us?

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

2010-03-10T05:15:00.001+07:00

Sometimes you just need to be with the person who makes you smile even if it means waiting.

2010-03-10T05:12:00.001+07:00

A learning experience is one of those things that says, “You know that thing you just did? Don’t do that.”

if I fell

2010-03-10T05:10:00.003+07:00

If I fell in love with you
Would you promise to be true?
And help me understand
'Cause I've been in love before
And I've found that love was more
Than just holding hands

If I give my hearts to you
I must be sure from the very start
That you would love me more than her

If I trust in you, oh please
Don't run and hide,
If I love you too, oh please
Don't hurt my pride like her

'Cause I couldn't stand the pain
And I would be sad
If our new love was in vain

So I hope you see that I
Would love to love you

If I fell in love with you....     

*The Beatles

overloaded

2010-03-10T04:57:00.005+07:00

Oh Dear GOD,hear me pray..

 Hear my thoughts
Hear my heart
It's a BIG tough heart
Which is refuse to breakdown
It always said,"I'm fine..."

It always accept everything
Never expect anything
In return
It always love to the fullest
It always said,"I'm doing just fine.."

It always survive
In every kind of burdens
It always sing a happy song
It always smile
Just like the bright sunny SUN

Oh Dear GOD,hear it says...
It tired to pretend
To pretend to be strong
Just for this one time...
Can you let it cry?
Can you let it scream?
Can you make it easier?
Widen it length
So it can carry much burdens
So it can finally say,
"I'm not fine..."   

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

Blooming Sun

2009-10-20T19:21:00.004+07:00

As I saw the sky today..
The Sun shined with smile
Bees buzzing all over
And Earth is still turning
Beyond gravitation

As I saw life today..
Kids playing jumps
Cats Dogs still fighting
People walking around
Making an O circle

As you can see today..
Through the window of future
Rain is falling
The sky still in grey
But still can't hide the green grass

As I getting older today..
I found that life is......
Beyond imagination
So real that it could hurt you
So boring that could tore you apart

But,As from now on..
I found life is so beautiful
I found GOD is fair
and I'm thankful
Oh Dear Almighty GOD

Look at me,I'm blooming..........
Into a beautiful red rose
Just like the blooming sun
Shining her courage out

Look at me,I'm blooming.........
Become into someone
A Human
With eloquently spoke
Languages of rainbows and perfect silence

Beautiful,just like the Blooming Sun.....

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia 11.03.09

2009-10-20T19:17:00.002+07:00

If GOD puts something in your life to make you fall, it's only because GOD wants to show you, you can stand back up!

# 1

2009-10-20T19:13:00.003+07:00

Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot,
who calls you back when you hang up on him,
who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat,
or will stay awake just to watch you sleep…

wait for the boy who kisses your forehead,
who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats,
who holds your hand in front of his friends,
who thinks you’re just as pretty without makeup on...

One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky his is to have you….   

The one who turns to his friends and says, "that’s her..."

Irrationally logically love method

2009-10-19T23:45:00.002+07:00

Berawal dari kamar mandi,jaring jaring metode penelitian ini muncul: 

Sama seperti matematika,si dewa hitung terkadang cinta butuh formula,butuh perhitungan,butuh logika dan terkesan sedikit abstrak.Menurut saya,Cinta itu Matematika.Dibutuhkannya formula rumus agar Cinta itu tumbuh,agar Cinta itu bertambah ataupun berkurang dan mungkin terbagi.Manusia tipe sosial menolak adanya matematika di dalam hidup,tapi manusia sosial pun bisa jatuh cinta bukan?kalian tidak akan berkenalan dengan abstrak cinta,jika matematika itu tidak ada.Kalian tidak akan selamat dari bencana cinta jika tidak ada logika. 

Seperti layaknya logika matematika yang paling mudah saja:

- P∧W = TRUE hanya jika P jatuh cinta dan W jatuh cinta 

- P∧W = FALSE hanya jika P jatuh cinta sedangkan W tidak,begitu pun sebaliknya.inilah yang dinamakan teori Cinta bertepuk sebelah tangan. 

Kepalan hati sudah berulang kali mengenal logika matematika,sudah berulang kali mendengarkan tutorial cinta.Apa yang dicari oleh sang hati?kesempurnaan kah,ketidakpedulian kah,atau kepuasan belaka?Apakah harus berputar berulang kali pada pusaran cinta sampai menemukan dasarnya?terus berputar hingga akhirnya menemukan cinta itu sendiri? 

Apa yang saya inginkan?metamorfosa cinta seperti apa,lembab kah,kering kah atau bersalju namun hangat di kepalan hati?seperti matematika,cinta itu sederhana dan rumit.tergantung metode dan logika apa yang digunakan?kalkulus cinta I kah,fungsi variabel cinta kompleks kah,atau aljabar cinta?

Saya..saya,saya hanya ingin..matematika dasar.  Kembali ke dasar,bersatu dengan para manusia sosial yang lebih setuju pada kebiadaban matematika dasar.Sudah sekiranya berputar cukup lama pada kalkulus cinta III,berputar dan sampai pada keinginan dasar saja,mencintai dan dicintai.hanya aku dan kamu.tidak kurang tidak lebih.tidak bermimpi,cukup di dunia realita saja.

Itu saja.   

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia 17.10.09 5:00am

Butterflies

2009-10-17T06:01:00.003+07:00

Your soft brown eyes and warm friendly smile
Have given me butterflies that I haven't had in awhile

In a T-shirt and jeans, or in a suit
Whatever you wear you always look cute

You're smart and work hard but when the day is done
You know how to relax and have some fun

I could spend all day listening to you talk
I love your voice and the way you walk

Your confidence is very endearing
Your lips are sexy, so is your brain

With just a wink and a grin
I feel my heart pound and my head spin

You brighten my day when you walk through the door
Whenever you look into my eyes I yearn for more

I can't stop fantasizing about what it'd be like
To have your arms wrapped around me throughout the night

But we are not together and I know one day
That this crush on you will go away

So before these feelings all come to an end
I wanna thank you for giving me butterflies again

unknown

this feeling

2009-10-17T05:59:00.002+07:00

Love.....

it hurts.
it makes u cry often.

but sometimes......
it makes u smile.

so why do we choose sometimes instead often?
that in the end..we'll cry more than smiling..

that's what i feel right now.

i choose to cry..
Maybe because I'm too coward for leaving the comfort zone

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

This is how life goes on

2009-10-17T05:56:00.002+07:00

when you think you know someone very well,
when you think he'll always gonna love you forever,
when you think he'll never say rude words to you,
when you think he's gonna be your true love,

But the truth is..
he caught between 'yes' and 'no',
he want freedom so badly so he threw you out of his life,
but on the other side, he knows that he still wants you,
he thinks no worry because he thought you're gonna stalking him forever,
so he put you in and out his heart, like a yoyo.

But what he doesn't know is..
you already give up on him,
you tired of this forever waiting,
you want to love again,
love someone who loves you more than he loves you,
you want to use this chance to find happiness,
and you realize that you're happier than ever.

But what does she get for telling him the truth..
A rude answer,
A forbidden words that a man can say to a woman,
suddenly you feel that "you're not belong to me anymore,coz you're immature",
"i can't live with someone who doesn't respect me as a woman",
you're not guilty at all,
because you're a free woman, free as a bird.

let us be what we have to be,
grow up and learn to letting go,
don't let hatred and revenge drown us apart.

you forgive him for all those words he said to you,
because you're grown up and already learned to letting go,
you think it's time to say goodbye to his intimate love,
but not goodbye to him,
because you know that he's gonna love you with different love.

so baby,try not to waste what's in front of you,
not to waste love that has been given to you,
because you'll end up having nothing but an empty hand.

and baby, this is how life goes on..

(for Chalie Rahadian,thank you for the 1st broken heart)

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia               

2

2009-10-17T05:53:00.001+07:00

dua hati 
hitam dan putih 
cinta dan mencinta 
benci dan membenci 
menang dan kalah 

tapi. . . 
dua lebih baik daripada satu 
genap lebih baik daripada ganjil 

namun alangkah tidak baik 
jika matahari beranak 
dan cinta pun mendua. . .

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

If Only

2009-10-17T05:50:00.001+07:00

I have to tell you this and you need to hear it. . . .

I've loved you since i met you 
But i wouldn't allow myself to truly feel it until today 
I was always thinking ahead 
Making decisions out of fear 

Today... 
Because of what i learned from you 
Every choice i made was different 
and my life has completely changed 

And I've learned that if you do that 
You're living your life fully 
It doesn't matter if you have five minutes or fifty years  

If not for today, if not for you 
I would never have known love at all  

So thank you for being the person who taught me to love
And to be loved...

- if only ♥

kisah tengah sore

2009-10-17T05:48:00.001+07:00

terang memudar membuat mata seakan mengabur 
adzan berkumandang ketenangan melanda 
awan berkisah tentang indahnya matahari 
ia jatuh cinta padanya 
terang pun tunduk pada kegelapan 

if the sun knows how to love 
how can we not love thee? 
love.love.just love. 
just like the brightness love the darkness

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia

.

2009-10-17T05:36:00.002+07:00

.awal

.perjalanan hidup

.sang penulis tinta

.dimulai

.dengan 1 titik 

xx, Ayu Putrinda Kurnia